But if you're going to have jokes that involve things folk might get offended at, you might as well make them funny. Las Vegas and Glasgow have a lot in common: theyre the only two places in the world where you can pay for sex with chips. Fewer than 700 drinks producers registered for the Scottish Government's flagship recycling scheme by the March 1 deadline despite officials expecting 4,500 sign-ups. Display as a link instead, We are starting to spend more time online and less being alive. They will be glimpsed only occasionally, stepping briskly into waiting cars. And your dad will enjoy it. Video, Record numbers of guide dog volunteers after BBC story, Prince Andrew offered Frogmore Cottage - reports, Bieber cancels remaining Justice world tour dates, Beer and wine sales in Canada fall to all-time low, Trump lashes out at Murdoch over vote fraud case, Man survives 31 days in jungle by eating worms, Eli Lilly caps monthly insulin costs in US at $35, Ed Sheeran says wife developed tumour in pregnancy, China and Belarus call for peace in Ukraine. In 2008, Boyle was investigated by the BBC Trust following complaints over a joke he made about Queen Elizabeth II on Mock the Week. Lorna Slater accused of 'desperate spinning' as small firms fail to register for deposit return scheme. Gunshots caught on doorbell footage as Greenock dad gunned down on his doorstep. And my thing was culture is a war of ideas. Frankie Boyle (born 16 August 1972) is a Scottish comedian and writer, known for his pessimistic and often crude sense of humour. [1][2][24][25] During the subsequent investigation, propane gas canisters were removed from the car. Meantime by Frankie Boyle review - the comedian's dark, funny Glasgow noir debut Withnail and I meets James Bond as two druggy neighbours and a celebrity crime novelist join forces to. I think what Scotland needs to do now is put England on the back foot, do something that the English wont expect, and the last thing that they expect is for us to become an Islamic caliphate. They had driven to London in two cars packed with gas canisters, petrol and thousands of nails. Above all, it continues to pack in appreciative audiences performance after performance and throughout the year. "[74], An article on the website of ABC News alleged that United States law enforcement officials were informed two weeks prior to the Glasgow incident of possible attacks on "airport infrastructure or aircraft" in Scotland and the Czech Republic, leading to the placement of Federal Air Marshals on flights into and out of Glasgow and Prague. Forget it. The US attacking Islam is like a serial killer being annoyed when the people locked in his basement start praying. 1.83m. Its unbelievable that all three comics live so close to each other.. But the BBC said: "Frankie Boyle's New World Order was shown after 10pm and its content is within audience expectations for a post-watershed, topical, satirical programme from a comedian whose style and tone are well-established. Stewart Andrew was also fined 1125 and ordered to pay a 75 victim surcharge to the woman, who he had previously been in a relationship with, when he appeared at Kirkcaldy Sheriff Court. He is the son of Irish Catholic parents from Crolly, a village on the border of The Rosses and Gaoth Dobhair, two districts in the northwest of County Donegal in the west of Ulster . Independent Scotland. When asked for a joke, Stephen Hazelton, 56, turned to another Scots comedy legend the late Chic Murray. Blackpool International Airport was shut down temporarily. Frankie Boyle | Official Website Frankie Boyle's Tour of Scotland Frankie sets off on a stand-up tour of Scotland. He was arrested while trying to board a flight with a one-way ticket to Bangalore, India, apparently to visit his newly born daughter. In his trunk., Josephine added: G12 definitely deserves the title of funniest postcode in Glasgow., Three of the country's top comedians live in the area. GMB's Susanna Reid forced to change dress that was too 'racy' for morning TV. I would have loved to have a gay dad. Read about our approach to external linking. [38] The public reactionparticularly in the blogospherewas amusement as much as fear. Anti speeding video should be Richard Hammond trying to remember his own wedding day. [46], Police made two further arrests in Paisley in the early hours of 2 July in connection with the attack, bringing the total number of arrests to seven. It is not clear if there was another device attached to the second car. Frankie Boyle: Lap of Shame The Scottish comedian tours his latest hour. Meantime by Frankie Boyle review - the comedian's dark, funny Glasgow noir debut Withnail and I meets James Bond as two druggy neighbours and a celebrity crime novelist join forces to. [10] Bilal Abdullah was later found guilty of conspiracy to commit murder and was sentenced to life imprisonment with a minimum of 32 years. We remember that the terrorists came in with refugees even though they dont seem to have done, especially since they were all French or Belgian. The Gers boss might be getting grief in the wake of Sundays League Cup final defeat but so is another Ibrox backer. Glasgow is a very negative place. 8 June 2017. [77], Mohammad Sarwar, MP for the nearby constituency of Glasgow Central, reported that threats had been made against the Muslim community in Scotland following the incident. [30], In the aftermath of the attack, the airport was evacuated and all flights suspended. [1][2] He thanked emergency services and urged the public to remain vigilant. [60], The incident has been described as inspiring others to take personal initiative and act decisively in a crisis. Christ he's not even got a football team yet!'. Secondly Bilal Abdulla (the other bomber) addressed his will to Abu Omar al-Baghdadi and Abu Hamza al-Muhajir, "Minister of War", who were the leader and deputy leader of al-Qaeda in Iraq[81] There were reports that al-Muhajir personally recruited people for the plot between 2004 and 2005[82]. [35] Scotland Yard reported that while the gas contained in the canisters and the quantity of the canisters remains unknown, further details would be given after they were analysed by forensic experts. Peppered with one-liners, it reads like Raymond Chandler in Glasgow. Israel say civilians are being killed because theyre living near terrorists and, to be fair, they are living stupidly close to Israel. present. Your link has been automatically embedded. [85], On 1 July, the American Airlines terminal at John F. Kennedy International Airport in New York was evacuated due to a suspicious package left on the . Glasgow funnyman Frankie Boyle (Image: Getty Images) Tony Curran The Glasgow-born star has gone on make it big in the US, starring in Sons of Anarchy, Daredevil and Undeworld Evolution. [66] Later in the year he accepted a job as head of security at a nearby company.[67]. The group disclosed disturbing details of how members plan to 'brick up' the sexual health clinic in March. [citation needed] Security measures were also increased at the T in the Park music festival in Balado, Kinross, which took place the weekend after the attack on Glasgow Airport.[75]. SNP leadership contender Ash Regan announces 'bonkers' currency plan for independent Scotland. The King's provides Glasgow's flourishing amateur groups with a high profile stage and was the location for the opening ceremony of Glasgow's European City of Culture events in 1990. Frankie Boyle has delighted and shocked audiences with his dark pessimistic brand of humour, since he first made his debut on Mock the Week in 2005, By Finlay Greig 2nd Apr 2020, 4:20pm - 6 min. [] well as being a big fan of Frankie Boyle and Stewart Lee, I also really like Omid Djalili(pronounced Omeed Jaleelee). Get the latest top news stories sent straight to your inbox with our daily newsletter. Meantime, by Frankie Boyle, Baskerville, 14.99. 39 FRANKIE BOYLE QUOTES, MOST CONTROVERSIAL April 3, 2016 Imran A Khan One of my favourite comedians is the always brilliant and always controversial Frankie Boyle. Frankie Boyle has tour dates in Edinburgh, Glasgow and Dundee from 12 September to 2 October 2019. The comedian's first novel follows a crime-solving junkie. [48], Also on 2 July, an eighth person was detained in Australia in connection with both the Glasgow and London attacks. It seems Al Qaeda dotoo - but boy, did they pick the wrong city to attack. An off-duty police officer hosed the burning man with a fire extinguisher as he tried to open the boot of the car, which unknown to the officer contained gas canisters and petrol. It later emerged the device was not explosive. Scots council bans fridges at recycling centre after fatal Perth explosion. On the evening of 30 June, Liverpool John Lennon Airport was closed for eight hours while a vehicle was removed and taken away for forensic testing, reopening at about 04:40 on Sunday morning. We will be allowed to keep our political rituals because they have an entertainment value, and because somebody needs to give speeches and answer questions. He is a TV personality, probably most famous for his many appearances on the BBC comedy quiz show Mock The Week, as well as his Channel 4 series Tramadol Nights. [9] Kafeel Ahmed died from his injuries on 2 August. There's a live show on YouTube where a guy at the beginning says he is our lenny Bruce, he is that good, maybe even better. The attack on Glasgow Airport appears to have been a response to the failure of two massive car bombs in London the day before. As Mr McIlveen and others fought with Abdulla, his co-conspirator Ahmed got out of the Jeep, totally covered in flames, and went to the boot of the car. Could you take that one again? [70], Scottish First Minister, Alex Salmond, along with the Cabinet Secretary for Justice, Kenny MacAskill and the Lord Advocate Elish Angiolini participated in the COBRA meeting chaired by Gordon Brown. One of the primary duties of a police officer is to preserve life and it doesnt matter whose life that is. The future Queen wore a statement red coat, seemingly a nod to St Davids Day and beamed after being gifted a bouquet by a young girl in traditional Welsh costume. BBCs coverage of Gaza is as shameful as anything it has ever done. During Abdulla's court case, prosecutors said that in both attacks it was good fortune alone that there had been no loss of innocent life. Boyles problem, if it is a problem, is that life, or society, is too bland for him. Theres a fallacy, isnt there, that that baggage handler prevented hundreds of people from being horribly burnt. [49] Australian news reports indicated that two people in Queensland were detained for questioning. "It did happen and it was a shocking spectacular event that everyone in Scotland will remember.". . According to Sky News, the gas cylinders contained propane, used for patio heaters. He doesnt really admire anyone on the mainstream comedy circuit, believing comedy has become a career, Theres a lot of banality about, and, despite his need to promote his autobiography, he rages against the fact that everything has become so PR-driven. McGills, Donna Higgins, 42, added: Its a lovely place and its great to have so many famous comedians. MostFringe comedy shows are easy pickings for guys like him - you take your pint in with you, and within 30 minutes you're starting to wonderhow long you can last without having to make a bee-line for the bog. Kevin Bridges and the boys from burinston used to write for FB and Frankie used to write for Jimmy Carr. [13], This attack, and the earlier attempt in London, were both notable as high-profile, yet substantially unsuccessful. THEY TOOK ALL THE MONEY. People say that Steve Jobs died too soon but I think it was a fitting metaphor for his companies attitude to battery life. Comedy fan Josephine Adams, 50, gave her best attempt at a one-liner. ARREST HER! Them being here definitely raises a smile.. Two Scottish chippies took home prizes from Tuesday's event while another was also a runner-up for the Takeaway of the Year. If you imagine that Palestine is a big cake, wellthat cake is being punched to pieces by a very angry Jew. Everywhere else, the police's job isto protect the people from terrorists - it's the other way round through there." Money is a belief system, it only works so long as we have confidence in it. [28] The second man, Bilal Abdullah, was initially held at nearby Govan police station, one of the UK's high security police stations with the capability to hold terrorist suspects. Our elected officials will soon fill a function much like the one the media fills now, as mere agents of a greater power. And we wont remember any of this once the new series of Britains Got Talent starts. I dont care if they wear a veil or not. Frantic search launched for man reported missing from Aberdeen in Audi. On this Wikipedia the language links are at the top of the page across from the article title. We also may change the frequency you receive our emails from us in order to keep you up to date and give you the best relevant information possible. The Glasgow Airport attack was a terrorist ramming attack which occurred on 30 June 2007, at 15:11 BST, when a dark green Jeep Cherokee loaded with propane canisters was driven at the glass doors of the Glasgow Airport terminal and set ablaze. First joke I thought of, having spent several years in Craigshill and De(a)dridge I found particularly funny. Boyle, 49, will be appearing at the Music Hall in the Assembly Rooms as part of the 75th anniversary season of the Fringe in August.. Popular Ayrshire chippy crowned 'best in UK' at top national awards, The Fish Works in Largs has scooped the huge award impressed industry experts at the National Fish and Chips Awards 2023, Tragic hillwalker and dog who plunged 100ft in Glencoe to have ashes scattered together. [78], On 24 October 2008 an interview with Abu Hamza al-Muhajir, the Minister of War for the so-called Islamic State of Iraq was released by the Al-Furqan Institute for Media Production. Sort of Star Wars from the point of view of the Stormtroopers. [60], Stewart Ferguson, an off-duty policeman, saw the flaming car and having approached it began to dose the flaming Kafeel Ahmed with a fire extinguisher. I gave him a good kick as well.". Within three days, Scotland Yard had confirmed that eight people had been taken into custody in connection with this incident and that in London.[1][4][5]. VideoRecord numbers of guide dog volunteers after BBC story. A Strathclyde Police spokesman confirmed the two men in the car were arrested,[26] one of them badly burned. At about 03:30 the car was transported to the Park Lane car pound. On the night of the attack, Scottish television station STV was meant to broadcast a one-off programme on the soon-to-be-released movie (at the time of the incident), Die Hard 4.0, however due to the nature of the film, the decision was taken to replace the programme. But after that attempt, we may leave the jokes to the professionals.. With no other role to play, our politicians will continue doing what they know: waving to the cameras, forcing a smile, hoping to keep us paying attention to their strange, dull ceremonies. [90], Coordinates: .mw-parser-output .geo-default,.mw-parser-output .geo-dms,.mw-parser-output .geo-dec{display:inline}.mw-parser-output .geo-nondefault,.mw-parser-output .geo-multi-punct{display:none}.mw-parser-output .longitude,.mw-parser-output .latitude{white-space:nowrap}555151N 42556W / 55.864150N 4.432120W / 55.864150; -4.432120. [Football commentary] Overpaidoverpaid knocks it on to overratedoverratedon to possible rapistpossible rapist knocks it forward to closet gaycloset gayGOAL! Stephens wife Elizabeth, also 56, added: There are a lot of good characters around here. Please check out our recertification policies to make sure you're . Growing up in Glasgow in the 1970s and 80s was not always the easiest and Frankie took to drinking very young to escape feelings of hopelessness. I think were heading for a two state solution. [65] In late July, Smeaton returned to his old job as a baggage handler at the airport. Barbera Deutsch, 60, added: This is the best place in the world to live. The presenter told viewers: "Oh yeah, I had a bit of an outfit, wardrobe crisis this morning". There was always a belief it could never happen here. But its unlikely Kevin, Frankie or Sanjeev worry about having a new rival on the block. The body of Kyle Sambrook and his beagle Bane were found in Glencoe on Saturday following a three-day search. Police arrest man after 'disturbance' near Scots primary school. Smeaton was awarded the Queen's Gallantry Medal;[68][69] this was presented by The Queen at a ceremony at Buckingham Palace on 4 March 2008. Cookie Policy Ash Regan claimed a devolved parliament could set up a new central bank and ditch the pound just months after a vote for indepenence. After explaining their mistake, I told them the only thing I know about urban survival is . when you're in a late night taxi queue in Glasgow and the guy behind you drops his kebab - RUN !! More often than not, the Glaswegians gags are. He ran over to help the police. Stalker cop who harassed fellow officer slapped with 12 month contact ban. And said"I bet his girlfriend's parents wished he'd hurry up and kill her, so they could grieve properly ". Some attack benefits & immigration but I think its worth remembering IT WAS THE BANKS. He chaired a meeting of COBRA, the government's emergency committee, on the evening of the Glasgow incident to deal with both it and the two London car bombs of the day before. Abdulla and Ahmed are thought to have been planning the London. One of my favourite comedians is the always brilliant and always controversial Frankie Boyle. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. [83], White House Press Secretary Tony Snow said that airport security in the United States would be tightened,[74][84] but that the airport terror alert level would remain at its current status, "Orange" (also called "High"), where it has been since late 2006. [17] An eyewitness noted that a man got out of the car and began to fight with police. What is it about that look that children find so sexy. The police officer in charge on the day of the Glasgow Airport terror attack 10 years ago has again praised the "heroism" of members of the public. "Hullo ya c****!" roared Frankie Boyle to a hometown Glasgow crowd and, just in case anyone took the greeting the wrong way, he. Hes just a stress ball for people who really caused the problem. I watched it, and I just thought this is boring. The plan was to detonate the bombs using a homemade device of a syringe full of matches and a mobile phone but the cars failed to explode and the attackers knew the police were on their trail. Europe's travel visa scheme is delayed again until next year. Boyle didn't hit the mark often enough when he tried to batter through some of the more touchy stuff. Angry mob target home in Scots street and hit riot police with fireworks and bricks, Fridges banned at Scots recycling centres after man died in fatal explosion, Stephen Flynn asks Rishi Sunak if it hurts that 'Labour believes in Brexit more than he does'. I mind folk used to preface their jokes on there with things like "This one's not for you, Frankie!". [3] Speaking about the London attacks, the judge said: "Your murderous intent was best shown by the obstructing of the safety mechanisms on two of the cylinders and by the 800-plus nails in one car and 1,000 in the second, designed to do nothing else but constitute a deadly form of shrapnel to maim, injure and kill. Read about our approach to external linking. Of course, well need to learn how to treat women slightly better, but we can change. Consumer culture needs us to be impulsive, while our political culture fears that we will ever develop discipline. Glasgow comedian Frankie Boyle is to return to his stand-up roots for a full run of shows at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe this summer. [29] Glasgow Prestwick, the city's second airport, was kept open with armed police on site. Comedy should have no sacred cows. [56] Ahmed was hospitalised at the Glasgow Royal Infirmary in critical condition, after he suffered severe burns to 90% of his body. It's the British way", "We may be witnessing the implosion of takfiri jihadists religious fanatics who are incredibly inept", "Terrorists are foiled at Glasgow airport", CBS News Special Report: Fiery Jeep Driven Into Glasgow Airport, 2016 stabbing of Charleroi police officers, 2016 stabbing of Brussels police officers, January 2015 anti-terrorism operations in Belgium, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=2007_Glasgow_Airport_attack&oldid=1141650997, Failed terrorist attempts in the United Kingdom, Terrorist incidents in the United Kingdom in 2007, Terrorist incidents involving vehicular attacks, Articles with dead external links from September 2010, Articles with dead external links from June 2016, Pages containing London Gazette template with parameter supp set to y, Short description is different from Wikidata, Articles with unsourced statements from April 2021, Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License 3.0, United States Secretary of Homeland Security, This page was last edited on 26 February 2023, at 03:26. He is a writer of three books, again strongly recommended as I hope to quote from these in a future blog. Our faces feel odd when we take our masks off. Its important for Britain to defend itself by bombing IS, in the same way you defend yourself from a wasps nest by hitting it with a stick. Everywhere else, the police's job is to protect the people from terrorists - it's the other way round through there." They put a numbing agent in the lining so you can last for longer Or, you can wear it inside-out so you dont have to wake anyone up! "Looking at CCTV from inside the airport, where you see people running screaming in horror, you would never understand what could have happened there. McIlveen tore a tendon in his foot when he kicked Ahmed in the groin. London Luton Airport has shared that there are two things we're terrible for leaving in our bags and cases: lighters and food.. As Northants Live reports, food items can cause delays for you (and other annoyed passengers) at security by obstructing images on x-ray machines.As a result, bags need to be checked manually, so to save time at security, stick food items in your hold luggage. We really cant show that at all. So I said what do you want, and they said, We had Patsy Kensit in today and that was good. She said, Culture is buying my daughter an ice-cream at the Natural History Museum. So thats what youre up against. Listed Under Comedy Events. [60], John Smeaton, a bag handler, was off duty when he saw the incident start to develop. Cops believe the man pictured will be able help assist with their ongoing investigation. FRANKIE BOYLE - LAP OF SHAME Live at King's Theatre, Glasgow Mon 13 Feb - Thu 16 Feb and Wed 15 Mar 2023 Sold Out! 'its ironic that he tried to start a religious war in Glasgow. [10] His last rituals were held in the UK. A close link was quickly established to the 2007 London car bombs the previous day. Change), You are commenting using your Twitter account. No, were not having a laugh. CCTV image of man released by police following serious assault in Glasgow. Clear editor. I dont read newspapers anymore. Did you fall over? I said, No. Apparently the Saudi Arabian Paralympic team is mainly thieves. Two Liverpool addresses were searched, in the Mossley Hill and Toxteth areas. Watched American Sniper. . Im just horrified by Donald Trump. Another resident, David Hobbat, 51, said: Its great to hear we have a star-studded neighbourhood. The Scottish-born Boyle, who is a cross between Jon Stewart and Rab C Nesbit, is a multifaceted talent: He is a stand-up comedian. The network reported that one of the three men could be an associate of Dhiren Barot, an Indian convert to Islam who was sentenced to life in prison in 2006 for plotting to fill limousines with explosives similar to those found in these incidents and park them in garages beneath hotels and office complexes. He went on to say he believed the British government and Army could equally be accused of terrorism for their actions in Iraq. The police brought the vehicle to a slow halt. [16] Police indicated the vehicle burst into flames when it was driven at the terminal. This means that we may include adverts from us and third parties based on our knowledge of you. [44] The case against him collapsed and Haneef was released . Frankie Boyles on tour. Edinburgh, Aberdeen, Cardiff, Belfast, Birmingham, Manchester and Newcastle's airports all took measures to prevent similar action by blocking off roads approaching and in front of the terminal buildings, with the terminals and blockades policed by local police forces. [27] The Jeep was removed early on the morning of 1 July, before flights resumed and the airport was partially reopened. [17] Affected patients were taken to the Southern General Hospital and the Western Infirmary. Police have launched a probe after a group of up to 300 people gathered outside a house in Graham Road, with the incident said to be the result of 'inaccurate information posted online'. Your previous content has been restored. With support the Running Time will be approximately 60-70 minutes. I mean, shes like the establishment candidate. Junior Editorial Assistant. ". Click the link below for tickets! I now know 16 ways to kick a Palestinian woman in the back. Frankie Boyle at The Glee Check shows at: Online Streams Birmingham Cardiff Nottingham Oxford Glasgow No upcoming events found. Enjoy priority booking & zero transaction fees with ATG Membership, 25% off drinks in-venue (10% in Scotland), Bar - Pre-show & interval drinks and snacks, Ambassador Lounge - Pre-show & interval table service (Charge applies), Membership Benefits - 10% off pre-show drinks (30mins prior). Something went wrong, please try again later. Frankie Boyle, coming out in defence of "trans folk" and alternative comedian Hannah Gadsby. He has written several articles for the Guardian, all of which I again highly recommend. And Hillary Clinton isnt much better. Another man exited the car and ran into the terminal building while he was on fire and began writhing on the ground, before being confronted by an airport employee, John Smeaton,[22] who was awarded the Queen's Gallantry Medal for his heroism. Despite his severe burns Kafeel Ahmed carried on fighting as they tried to pull him away from the car. [12], A dark green Jeep Cherokee, registration number L808 RDT,[13] travelling at a speed estimated by a witness as about 30mph[14] (48km/h), struck security bollards in a terror ramming attack at the main entrance to Glasgow Airport. You can post now and register later. Impersonating the royal's voice, he joked: "I . [71], Kenny MacAskill, the Cabinet Secretary for Justice, insisted that the recent terrorist attack on Glasgow Airport was not committed by 'home-grown' terrorists.[72]. Its when you see them in London, taking photos of each other as tourists. The head of Scotland Yard's counter-terrorism command said, "It is obvious that if the device had detonated there could have been serious injury or loss of life. Stirling Ukrainian refugee shares terrifying story of escaping homeland a year on from invasion. 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Contender Ash Regan announces 'bonkers ' currency plan for independent Scotland and alternative comedian Hannah.! On his doorstep football team yet! ' with one-liners, it like... Hammond trying to remember his own wedding day bombs in London, photos. Some of the Stormtroopers his girlfriend 's parents wished he 'd hurry and! Pictured will be able help assist with their ongoing investigation Frankie used to for... Many famous comedians Kyle Sambrook and his beagle Bane were frankie boyle glasgow airport attack in on. Indicated that two people in Queensland were detained for questioning will ever develop discipline this one not. Online Streams Birmingham Cardiff Nottingham Oxford Glasgow No upcoming events found one my! Recycling scheme by the March 1 deadline despite officials expecting 4,500 sign-ups doorbell footage as Greenock dad gunned down his. 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David Hobbat, 51, said: its great to have been a response to second., petrol and thousands of nails trans folk & quot ; and alternative comedian Hannah Gadsby his... Getting grief in the blogospherewas amusement as much as fear you imagine that Palestine is a war of.... Occasionally, stepping briskly into waiting cars bombs the previous day strongly as... Several years in Craigshill and De ( a ) dridge I found particularly funny to live new series Britains! Think it was the BANKS handler prevented hundreds of people from terrorists - it the! Soon fill a function much like the one the media fills now, frankie boyle glasgow airport attack mere agents of a police is! At a nearby company. [ 67 ] sign in now to post with your account well. `` ]! Presenter told viewers: `` Oh yeah, I had a bit of an outfit, wardrobe this! Story of escaping homeland a year on from invasion, a bag,!

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